Archive for the ‘Problem Solving Strategies’ Category

Choosing a Therapist*

Wednesday, June 20th, 2007

If you have decided to seek the help of a mental health professional, this page will help you to simplify the process of choosing a therapist.

The therapist should be licensed, or an intern/resident under the supervision of a professional licensed in the same field. All of the therapists listed below can provide individual, marriage, family and group therapies.

Psychiatrist – This is a medical doctor with additional, specialized training in psychiatry. About one-third are Board Certified. Psychiatrists can prescribe medications, and may also provide psychotherapy (”talk therapy”), although this would be an expensive source. A psychiatrist or other medical doctor should be seen, in addition to a therapist, for severe symptoms of depression, psychosis (hallucinations and delusions), or manic symptoms.

Psychologist – Ph.D. in Psychology. Although called by the title, “Doctor,” they cannot prescribe medication. Psychologists also administer psychological tests.

Licensed Clinical Social Workers (LCSW) – Master’s Degree in Social Work with an additional two years of supervised experience.

Marriage and Family Therapist (MFT) – Master’s Degree in Marriage and Family Therapy with an additional two years of supervised experience.

Licensed Professional Counselor (LPC) – Master’s Degree in Psychology with an additional two years of supervised experience.

INITIAL QUESTIONS TO CONSIDER

  • How much can I afford per month (there are resources for reduced rates with some agencies)?
  • What does my insurance cover, and are there limits to the number of visits per year?
  • What is my co-pay (the amount you must pay in addition to what your insurance pays)?
  • Does my insurance have a list of approved providers?
  • Is the therapist licensed?
  • How much experience does s/he have?
  • Do I need individual, marriage or family therapy?
  • Would I prefer a male or female therapist?
  • If the person needing help is a child, does the therapist have experience working with children?
  • Do I need a therapist with specialized experience (i.e. sexual abuse, domestic violence, etc.)?
  • Is the age, religion, ethnicity, or other attribute of the therapist important to me?
  • Is there someone I trust that could recommend a good therapist?
  • Am I ready to make a commitment to work hard in self-evaluation and improvement?

QUESTIONS AFTER THE FIRST SESSION

  • Did I feel the therapist gained a basic understanding of the issues important to me?
  • Is the therapist someone with whom I can trust my most private thoughts and feelings?
  • Did I feel respected by the therapist?
  • Does the therapist have time to meet with me regularly (usually weekly initially)?
  • Was I included in the formulation of the therapy plan, including length of treatment and diagnosis?

A GOOD THERAPIST WILL NEVER…

  • Talk freely to others of your private information.
  • Engage in sexual behavior of any kind with a current or former client.
  • Enter business transactions outside of therapy with a current or former client.
  • Get involved socially with current or former clients.
  • Accept large gifts from current or former clients.
  • Take phone calls during sessions.
  • Provide treatment for family and friends.

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*This information was obtained from the Wasatch Mental Health website.

Your Inner Voice

Sunday, June 17th, 2007

There is something inside each of us that knows how to solve our problems. That something is called by many different names, depending on who you are talking to. Spirit, heart, soul, intuition, inspiration, conscience, higher self, God, …. the list of how people refer to this phenomenon is as long as the list of religions and philosophies out there. I will refer to this “something” as your inner voice or intuition (for the sake of simplicity).

InspirationYour Inner Voice

No matter who you are, where you are, or what you are doing in life, you have some familiarity with your inner voice, even if you have not yet realized it. It is that small whispering that comes from deep within you. It is the voice that tells you something is wrong, even if you have rationalized to yourself that it isn’t. It is the part of you that does not always appeal to your logic, but is always providing information that is for your highest good. Sometimes the task required of you by your inner voice is difficult, but you are never forced to follow.

Recognition of the Inner Voice

The way you experience hearing your inner voice may be different from others. Therefore, there is no way that I can tell you exactly what your inner voice sounds or feels like.

There are some things that I have learned on my own, and also from others who have shared their experiences with me. The following things seem to be true about the way intuition comes to most people:

  • There is no confusion coming from your inner voice. Although the things it tells you may disagree with your logic (and that of the world), you will feel a sense of peace, calm and certainty about what you are thinking and/or feeling. If you can set the other parts of your consciousness aside, and focus only on the inner voice, you will clearly know what do to.
  • Intuition is often an emotional process rather than a logical one. However, this is not to say that intuition never works with logic. Your intuition often guides you toward completely logical solutions! Generally, the reason your inner voice conflicts with your logic is only because your cognitive process is flawed, or you do not yet have enough information to understand the full picture. After you follow the whisperings of your inner voice, you can usually look back and see the logic in that guidance.
  • Many people describe the feelings related to their inner voice as warm, peaceful, light, hopeful, conviction, happy, love… Intimidation, fear and shame do not originate from your inner voice.
  • If you are unsure about what your inner voice is saying, try to look at your thoughts and feelings over a period of time. Your inner voice will not change its message just because a few days or weeks pass. If the same answers keep coming to you over and over, it is very possible that it your inner voice trying to tell you something.
  • As mentioned earlier, the more heed you give to the prompts of your inner voice, the more easily you are able to hear and recognize the voice the next time you need to hear it.

Strengthening Your Inner Voice

Following the prompts of your inner voice has a way of increasing your ability to hear it.

It is as if, with your choice to follow that voice, you are giving an invitation for it to come back and lead you again. Conversely, when you ignore what your inner voice tells you over and over again, you become more tuned out from the whisperings, and you may stop hearing it all together.

The more you obey your inner voice, the more you learn to trust it. This happens as you see that your inner voice really is wise and always pointing you toward your greatest good. It is easier to follow as your trust increases, and trust is built as the wisdom of that voice is validated by the outcomes of your decision to follow.

Following Your Inner Voice vs. Ignoring It

Each time your inner voice communicates something, you have the choice to follow the guidance it provides, or not. As mentioned before, you are never forced or coerced to follow your intuition. And as stated earlier, sometimes your inner voice directs you to do things are not easy.

So why follow your inner voice?

Because it always leads you toward your highest good.

If you want to test this statement to see if it holds true for you, there are a couple of ways to do it.

First, examine your past.

Have you had your intuition tell you to do something, and you chose not to? Or maybe, your inner voice told you NOT to do something, and you went ahead and did it anyway? Of course you have. What were the consequences?

Now think of a time when, intuitively, you knew you had to do something that did not make sense to you logically. You followed your heart in spite of this conflict with logic. Where did this choice lead you?

In looking back at both types of examples, is the idea that your intuition always leads you to your highest good validated?

Another way to test the wisdom of your inner voice is to start paying attention to it startingi now. It may be helpful to keep an ongoing journal of the whisperings you hear, whether or not you follow, and the consequences (good and bad) that result from the decisions you make.

Inner Voice and Your View of Life

You might be asking the question; what exactly is my inner voice? Where does it come from? Is it a part of who I am, does it come from a power higher than myself? How does my inner voice know how to guide me to my highest good? What is the source of my inner voice?

These questions raise many philosophical and spiritually based issues that I cannot address here. Finding answers to these questions is very personal. The pursuit of doing so presents a unique experience to each individual.

I encourage you to seek the answers that will help you understand these things. Ironically, it is your inner voice that will lead you on this journey. Be willing to listen and follow what that voice tells you. As you listen and follow your intuition, you will be led to what you need to know.

Conclusion

Learning to follow your intuition may be the single most valuable thing you can do in life. Your inner voice is the greatest resource you have in solving your problems. Do everything you can to honor your intuition, and it will lead you toward the solutions you seek.

Taking Responsibility for You

Monday, June 11th, 2007

Taking responsibility for yourself is a huge step in solving any problem you come across in life. It means that you acknowledge your contribution both to your current circumstances, and your role in your future. Many people see taking responsibility as taking blame for what has already happened.  Being responsible for your future is the other part of the equation.

I see so many people act like victims of the life they are in. “If only this, if only that, if he wouldn’t, if she would,…. ” This is a very stifling and ineffective way to approach life. If you always blame others, you are in effect giving them control over what happens to you.

Try this exercise: (It may be helpful to write it down).

Think about one thing in your life right now that has you worried. It could be anything; relationship, finances, career, children, …….  Now think about why you are in that situation.  Think of all the ways you can blame others. Think about this long and hard.   After you have established the “blaming” mindset, try to think of a way to fix the problem. You will most likely not be able to arrive at a solution, or the solutions you do come up with are unlikely to work because they involve changing another person.  And that is one thing you truly have no control over. Pretty depressing, huh?

Now think about the problem again, but this time, take a different approach.  Whether or not you are completely at fault, it is time to shift into responsibility mode. Think of all the ways you have contributed to the problem.  Think of things you have control over, and make a plan as to how you will resolve this problem with those assets.  If your issue involves other people (which most problems do),  take 100% responsibility for your part. Commit to do everything in your power and then some to remedy the situation. If you cannot resolve the situation to your liking, commit yourself to extract value and develop into a better person as a result of this problem.

How does the second approach to your problem feel different from the first?

There is empowerment and peace when you start to approach your life with an attitude of responsibility. Admitting responsibility means assuming the power you have had all along.

Create a Plan of Action

Monday, June 11th, 2007

Once you have decided on a course of action, it is time to make a specific plan based on that decision. The option you decided on in the previous step will provide the framework for your plan. This involves setting short term goals, and making a plan that takes into account your specific situation.

Because this article is so generalized, it is difficult to set out a process for planning that would be relevant to every situation. However, the following 6 ideas are important to keep in mind no matter what you are dealing with:

1. Know your weaknesses and limitations. Don’t set yourself up for failure. Be realistic.

2. Capitalize on your strengths and resources. Make an inventory of them, and find ways to use them to your advantage.

3. Anticipate obstacles. Be prepared for them so their impact on your goal is minimal. This also helps prevent discouragement because when obstacles do come up, you had already planned for them. They are just part of the process.

4. Write down your plan. There is something very powerful about getting it out of your brain and onto paper. I feel more committed and accountable when I write it down.

5. Make your plan as specific as you can. At the same time, be open minded and flexible. Be willing to change the specifics depending on how well they are (or aren’t) working for you. Many times your vision becomes clearer as you are actually working on your goals, and you will realize that your original plan can be improved.

6. Figure out how you will measure your progress. Make sure it is a part of your plan to assess how you are doing periodically.

Once you have a plan, it is time to JUST DO IT!!!!!

Creative Problem Solving: Get Outside the Box

Tuesday, June 5th, 2007

Generally, when people try to solve a problem, they turn to solutions that are most familiar and socially acceptable. This is OK, if the solutions work. However, I have seen great things happen when a more obscure, socially questionable approach is taken.

I have a co-worker who is a single man in his 40’s. He decided a few months ago that he was not reaching his financial goals. After brainstorming through his options, he made a very drastic move. He gave his dog away, put most of his things in storage, sold his motorcycle and bought an SUV. He moved out of the house he was renting, and became homeless by choice. He is now directing all of his income toward his savings/investments. The only money he uses for everyday expenses (like food) is money that he gets by selling things on e-bay. He has a gym membership, so he goes there to shower. He sleeps in his car. He spends the rest of his time between his office and school.

Most people who I share this true story with shake their heads and say that this guy must be crazy. Maybe he is a little crazy. But I have to give him kudos for thinking outside the box, and having the guts to make such a drastic life change.

From what I have seen, my friend seems to be thriving in his new lifestyle. He was very unhappy and depressed before. Now he exudes hope and confidence. He is excited that he is actually making significant progress on his goals. He has told me that in addition to progressing toward his financial goals quickly, he is happy with many of the side effects of being homeless.

One of the unexpected perks is that he no longer vegetates in front of the TV at night, wasting hours doing nothing. If he wants to watch TV, he goes to the gym and walks on the treadmill during the show he wants to see. Recently, he was watching an NBA playoff game that was several hours long, and he walked during the entire game. He is losing weight and feeling healthy. He also recently got up the courage to contact an old schoolmate that he has always had a crush on. He has had so much positive energy since he became homeless.

This guy is not planning to maintain his homeless lifestyle forever, just until he reaches certain goals. He projects that he will reach those goals in a few months, at the rate he is going.

Now, I know this is an extreme example that most people, myself included, could not pull off. My co-worker is free of many of the obligations that require one to have a home, such as children.

The reason I share this story is to illustrate the principle of thinking creatively when it comes to finding solutions to your problems. Don’t do yourself an injustice by ignoring options just because others didn’t have the same idea, or because they won’t understand your method.

About seven years ago I was struggling, once again, with being overweight. I had tried lots of weight loss methods, and was feeling down because of my failures. At that time, I decided that I did not want to diet anymore. I was tired of the constant battle with food. I decided that to get to a healthy weight and stay there, I would have to become a really good exerciser. I took it a step further. I had seen my mom run a marathon, and had been inspired as I watched her, and the other runners cross the finish line. It was a very moving experience for me, and I had a deep desire to be one of those people.

It was March or April when I made the decision. The marathon I decided to run was in October of that year. I was 40 lbs overweight and could barely run for a couple minutes straight, let alone 26.2 miles. When I told people about my intentions, I could see the disbelief in many of their eyes.

I started training by running around a track… running one lap, walking a lap, running a lap, walking a lap. At times I felt foolish for aiming so high. I could imagine what reaction I would get if I were to tell the athletes that were running ahead of me about my aspirations. But most of the time, I was so determined that I was going to reach my goal that I just kept looking forward to the future and doing whatever it took to reach the goal.

Although I will not write about my entire marathon experience here (it is definitely enough for its own post), I will conclude by saying that I did run the marathon, and it was one of the best experiences of my life. I learned things about myself and gained confidence that is very much a part of who I am today. I did have the side effect of losing weight as I trained (which was originally my primary goal), but this was only a small part of the positive rewards I had for my efforts.

Had I let social norms and the expectations of others dictate my approach to weight loss, I never would have had the marathon experience.

My point in saying all this is to encourage you to look inside yourself for answers that may be less than obvious. When you come up with an idea that seems wild or too out there, don’t discount it right away. Really think about it and consider if it is actually feasible. If it is not, think about it in variations that might work.

If you feel very passionate about an idea that seems crazy to everybody else, maybe you are actually onto something.

Explore the Options

Friday, June 1st, 2007

Once you have identified your problem, you are ready to begin the process of finding a solution. This process basically involves explorinsign with arrowsg possible solutions and deciding which option you will implement.

This process can be simple, especially if you are already familiar with the particular problem you are trying to solve. For example, I have struggled with weight issues since I was young. I have already done a lot of the process of sorting through the different approaches to weight loss, and I know which one has worked for me in the past. Therefore, when I find myself in a situation where I need to lose weight, I don’t have to go back and find what works all over again.

If you are unfamiliar with your problem, or if you have never experienced a satisfactory solution to an ongoing dilemma, the process of identifying the solution will probably take more time. You may find yourself overwhelmed with all the information, and all the people who are trying to sell you on different solutions.

I will outline some principles that I find to be very helpful in the process we are discussing. These principles can be applied in a variety of different problem solving situations.

1. Do your research. Take advantage of all the information that is available. Make sure your information comes from valid sources (for example, if you read an article in a magazine that says “Advertisement”, realize that the source of the article is trying to sell you their product. Therefore the article may not be very objective).

2. Seek information from others who have experienced the same problem you have, and who you feel have successfully resolved or managed their issue. I have found this way of exploring options to be very useful.

3. Consider the resources you are able to put into solving this problem. Be realistic. How much money, time and effort can you afford to put toward solving this problem? What are the differences in cost between solutions?

4. When considering options, it is important that the method you choose is congruent with your personal values.

5. Don’t overanalyze and get stuck in this step. It is better to choose an option, try it and fail then it is to become paralyzed at this stage because you aren’t sure what to do. Failure is a great tool that can help you refine your search for a solution that works. In Steve Pavlina’s Personal Development for Smart People he talks about how it is better to take the “Ready, fire, aim” approach rather than the “Ready aim aim aim aim” approach. Meaning that firing at the wrong target can give you valuable feedback so you can aim more accurately the next time. But if you just keep aiming without firing, you will definately not hit your target.

6. Have an open mind. Some of the best solutions ever have been found when people were creative and were able to think outside the box.

7. Listen to your intuition . Learn to connect with your inner voice and learn to trust yourself. Remember that you are the expert when it comes to you. Have confidence in your ability to choose the way that will work for you. Read this excellent article that delves more deeply into the role of intuition in decision making.

Take the time and effort to make the best decision you can. But as I mentioned in step #5, don’t get stuck here because you can’t decide how you want to resolve your problem. Make the best decision you can with the information you have.

Once you have decided on a course of action, it is time to make a specific plan. That process will be addressed in the next section of this series.

The Value of Adversity: A Path to Personal Growth

Sunday, May 27th, 2007

I like problems. You should too. Before you decide that I am crazy, and navigate away from this page, please hear me out. By the end of this article, you may agree with me.

Don’t get me wrong. I never start a day in search of problems. In fact, along with most of the world, I spend a good amount of time trying to avoid them (whether directly or indirectly). When a problem does come along, it almost always gets an initial negative response from me. It is usually not until I reach the “end” of a problem, or even when a good amount of time has passed since the issue was resolved, that I can truly appreciate the great opportunity that was disguised as something not so great.

Everybody experiences problems, discomfort, adversity, or whatever you want to call it (I will use these words interchangeably throughout this article). It is an inescapable part of the human condition. Almost immediately after you were born, you began to experience discomfort. Cold, hunger, tiredness, loneliness. As a baby, you didn’t have much of a choice in how you were going to handle your problems. Either your needs were met and you learned to trust the world around you, or they were not, and you learned to distrust.

As you grew, your discomforts and problems became more complex. I won’t attempt to list the potential problems you have had because the list is endless, and your experience is unique. Chances are, you are in the middle of some type of problem right now. It may be minor or it may be huge. I don’t think anybody will argue the fact that we all have discomfort and problems in life. Let’s move on to where the value lies in those problems.

Think of the finest person you know. A real quality individual. What is it that made you think of this person? I highly doubt it is someone who has sailed through life without a care or worry (as if those people even exist). If you really analyze that person and what it is you value in them, it is most likely a quality that was developed through one or many problems that they used as stepping stones in their lives. If you don’t know this person well, you may not know what that situation was that refined them into who they are today. But I can 100% guarantee that if you could read the book of their life, you would see that they had waded through some significant difficulty to become who they are today.

Do problems always have the positive effect I am talking about? No. Do problems always present an opportunity for growth? Absolutely, yes.

The difference lies in the individual who has the problem, and how they choose to handle it. There are a few basic approaches people take when they come against an obstacle in life.

1. Denial: This person spends a lot of time and energy trying to deny that a problem exists. However, problems rarely disappear into thin air just because we tell ourselves they aren’t there.

2. Avoidance: The person who avoids may acknowledge there is a problem, but for a variety of reasons, chooses not to act toward resolution of the problem. A common reason for this approach is fear, a belief that there is no resolution, or doubt that they are capable of doing what it takes to solve the problem.

Drug abuse is a very good example of avoidant behavior. Most of the people I have met who have issues with substance abuse are self-medicating. They are numbing themselves because for whatever reason, they don’t want to deal with some situation in their life. Unfortunately, this method of avoidance only creates more serious problems for the abuser.

People who avoid finding solutions to big problems often develop very negative feelings. These people will often spend incredible amounts of time and energy (including the energy of others) complaining and whining. They find ways to blame others for their problems, whether they say it out loud or not. They often view the world in a very pessimistic way, and become resentful and bitter toward their problem, and often toward others. *

3. The third way to deal with a problem is to acknowledge/identify the problem, take responsibility, identify a solution, and implement the solution. This approach is a process that results in growth and personal development.

In many situations, the problem you identify may be one that is impossible for you to solve. For example, somebody who has terminal cancer does not have control over their illness. They can seek appropriate medical treatment and try everything they can to fight the disease. Ultimately, the end result is really not something they can control. In situations like these, the solution is not about changing the unchangeable. The solution is in how we choose to view and deal with the situation. It is in finding how to extract value from the problem.

The frequently cited quote of Viktor Frankl , a Holocaust survivor, illustrates this point perfectly. “Everything can be taken from a man but… the last of the human freedoms-to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way” (p.104, Man’s Search for Meaning).

This reminds me of a movie I recently saw. In this movie, there are two young boys who grow up in an orphanage. They both suffer a great deal from the pain of having no parents. Time passes and we learn that one of the boys passed through his childhood to become a happy and productive adult, who contributes significantly to the world. The other boy grows up to be his adult nemesis, always trying to ruin the man who is so successful. The difference between the two was how they chose to deal with the same situation. One took the road to success, while the other took the road to bitterness, jealousy,and unhappiness.

As I look back on my life up to this point, one thing is very clear to me. My most difficult times have been the most valuable to me. I have learned the most profound, soul changing truths when I have been in the not so pleasant trenches of humility and pain. I have developed a deep compassion for others who suffer. I have come to appreciate more deeply the good times,and the sweet things in life. Experiencing confusion has helped me understand the value of peace and clarity.

My goal with this article is not to pump you up so that you will go out looking for problems. It is to help you realize that with problems comes tremendous opportunity. If you identify yourself as being in denial or avoidance, you can consciously move toward more productive ways of dealing with your issue. If you can see a problem for what it really is, the process is so much more worthwhile. If you are in the middle of a crisis, take a moment to step outside of the situation. Think to yourself “what opportunity is this problem presenting to me? What rewards could wait at the end of this difficulty?” The answers may surprise you, and bring you some peace and hope even in the midst of a storm.

* Note: There is a time and a place for anger, sadness, denial, etc. These are all healthy and natural parts of the grieving process. The difference between healthy grieving and the issues that arise with avoidance is that with grieving, you should reach a point of acceptance and healing. The person who avoids is never able to reach this point because the issue is never addressed.

A Guide to Problem Identification

Thursday, May 24th, 2007

onion 2The first step toward finding a solution is identifying the problem. This may sound simple, and sometimes it is. However with those things that have the most negative impact in your life, it is usually complex to uncover the core issue. Many times, the thing you may identify as the problem is really just a symptom of an even deeper, more fundamental problem.
For example, an overweight person may find their issue to consist of the following dimensions: The top layer would be the obvious facts; the individual takes in more calories and/or exercises less than is optimal for their body to maintain a healthy weight. Someone who does not have a weight problem may look at an overweight person and wonder why they don’t take the obvious steps to lose weight. I doubt there are many overweight adults who don’t know that they should eat less and exercise more. The observer may consider that the individual is just lazy or lacks motivation. Often, lack of willpower and low motivation are factors, but they are just another layer in the onion. Below the surface, weight issues are rarely a simple matter of lack of knowledge, willpower, or motivation.

So lets move deeper into the weight problem. Here is where your problem becomes more unique and less obvious. Just one example of an underlying issue could be the fear of attracting attention from the opposite sex. Underlying this issue could be that the person was raped or violated in some other way. It is like peeling layers off an onion, and in many cases there are many many layers. See how finding the real problem can actually be quite complicated?

I am going to stop here to say that I am not a proponent of waiting until you have gotten to the very bottom of a problem to start working toward resolving it. Why? Very often, getting to the bottom of the proverbial onion is something that is just far too painful for you to handle. Sometimes it is not even possible. At least right now.

My suggestion is that you peel that onion as far as you can handle and at the same time be functional. If you find yourself curled up in bed, unable to go to work because you realized that the real reason you cannot trust your spouse is because your father abandoned you, don’t go there yet. It’s OK to know that there is still more to uncover as you start working on the issue. Allow yourself to grow and develop and as you go through the process, you will become more able to identify and accept what lies beneath the surface. This is not the same as being in denial about the real issue. It is simply acknowledging that you are not able or ready to really get into it.

When you find a solution to a problem that is just a symptom of a bigger problem, you are really just learning to cope with the symptom. This is perfectly fine, and better than continuing in a negative behavior just because you haven’t faced the issue beneath it all yet, for whatever reason.

For example, I have Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD). There are debates about the real cause of this, along with most mental health disorders. Is it biological, environmental, unresolved issues from childhood? Nobody knows for sure, which prevents me from solving the real problem. However, I have found ways to cope with the symptoms. The solutions I have found are acceptable to me for now. I am able to function and live life pretty much the same as others around me. If I were to be obsessed with finding the real reason for my disorder, I would become highly frustrated because it would be hard to come up with a definitive answer.

So keep in mind that often, your problem solving will be focused on finding strategies to manage the symptoms. If you are clinically depressed but have not figured out WHY, it’s OK. One coping strategy might be taking an anti-depressant. The real underlying issue has not been solved, but a painful symptom may be alleviated. This allows you to function and be more effective in your search for other long term solutions.

I suggest sitting down in a quiet place, with a pencil and paper. Give yourself enough time to really reflect on the issue you are trying to address. Brainstorm on paper if this helps. If it helps to talk it out with someone, do that. The point is, open yourself up and consider what the problem really is. Dig down as deep as you can or want to. Like I said above, if you start feeling your world crashing down because you dug too far, stop for now. Put that part on a shelf and give yourself permission to deal with it later. If your problem really has no known cause, stop at the symptoms that lie right above what could be the cause.

It really is not necessary that you ever get to the root of some problems. Sometimes, though, there will be a trade off you must be willing to accept. My grandfather was a World War II veteran. From the little he talked about his experiences, I gather that he saw many things in the war that traumatized him. He suffered from insomnia for years, and he hinted to me that he had nightmares frequently about his experiences in the war. He was never willing to talk openly about what he experienced with me or anybody else, to my knowledge. I think my grandpa dealt with his trauma the way he was taught, and the way he saw best. I also believe that the things he experienced festered inside of him for the rest of his adult life. Had he processed this information in a therapeutic way, he may have not had so many sleep issues for the next 70 years of his life.

And then there are the problems that really don’t have a deep dark issue attached to them. If you really cannot peel the layers off a problem, it is likely that what you see is what you get. For example, sometimes I have the problem of not knowing what to fix for dinner. All it takes is a little planning and my problem is solved. Don’t take this article about problem solving to an extreme where you are making problems bigger than they really are.

In social work, a process we frequently refer to is “assessment”. One dictionary definition of this word is: “To determine the value, significance, or extent of.” In problem identification, it is necessary to always be assessing the extent and significance of the problems. Assessment needs to be a part of your problem solving strategy. This process is not linear, and neither is identifying your problem. This means it is not something that you do only in the beginning of the process. Assessment is something that is ongoing. If you keep this in mind, even if you start at a level that is not as deep as the real problem, eventually, through ongoing assessing, you will eventually get to the core if that is your goal.

Another important suggestion is that if the issue is a very painful one for you to deal with, you should seriously consider becoming involved with a therapist to help you through this process. If you decide to take this path, see “Choosing a Therapist”.